This passion come about for me because of my Little girl, Joy, and my Journey while Pregnant with her, and the experience I had with my Doula.
Pregnancy for me was the most special time of my life. A Transformative one, the most beautiful and strongest I have ever felt in my life.
I was in awe of how divinely created women are, to grow our babies and to birth them. whole heartedly, trusting in the birth process.
My pregnancy and birth journey literally opened my heart to a burning desire to support other women during this special time of their lives. I remember saying to my doula, Moran after Joy was born, something along the lines of ... thank God I had you, every woman needs a Doula.
My Birth Story
Friday the 19th of February my Partner James and I went to visit a friend. During that day I noticed my belly going rock hard, and then soft (no cramping or anything) all day. I just kept going about my day. later on that afternoon around 5pm I had a period like cramp and experienced Braxton hicks before my next period like cramp at 11:28pm, then another at 11:48pm, 12:07am(Saturday the 20th) 12:40am, 1:12am, 1:31am. I went to sleep and woke up at 2:55am with a stronger period like cramp, I needed a heat pack. these stronger period like cramps kept coming, 3:17am, 3:30am, 3:40am, 3:53am. I then messaged Moran and stopped putting things in my phone, and woke James. We were both so excited, but I tried to play it down thinking this could last days or fizzle out. By 6:52am James made contact with Moran and I was riding the waves. Experiencing some back labour, loss of moucus plug. I had to keep moving. My most loved position at this point which was instinctive, was one leg up on a chair and doing hip circles. Although things were definitely active and intense I was still in denial I was in labour. James wanted to head to the birth centre and meet Moran there, but I feared being turned away and said no. Moran arrived to my house around 8am. posterior labour, that intensified, missed the boat to get the birth centre. I was held and supported by Moran, she kept me active doing all sorts of things. I had full trust in her, while James kinda just stayed in his lane after I didn't want to go to the birth centre when he wanted to. I soon felt the urge to bear down while at home and a quick decision was made whether to birth at home or go to the Redlands hospital. The Redlands hospital we went. the car ride was so intense, I was not getting any break from my surges, literally one after the other and I was roaring. arrived at hospital and I waddled in there stopping every so often with a loud roar, with no shoes on, a big messy bun on the top of my head wearing a big moo moo dress. (so wish I could see footage of this moment walking in I literally laugh thinking about it). got to a birth room, midwives trying to talk to me, while having surge after surge, wanted to check me I declined. they wanted me on the bed, I declined, then my waters released and there was meconium. that sensation of my waters releasing I was like WOWWWW my waters!! so because of meconium I wasn't allowed in the bath. they wanted the belly band on for fetal monitoring to check bubs heart rate, which I declined, so they used a doppler. Bubs heart rate was low, which is normal during surge, but they couldn't get a good reading after surge. So we went with the belly band monitoring. Because that was showing bubs heart rate was low, they got me onto the bed, and it kinda went abit pear shaped. James was in the back of the room, more people come into the room, I had a female doctor who to me, appeared she didn't know what she was doing, a midwife attempted several times to put a cannula in my hand, which she failed several times. (prepping me for a cesarean) Moran reassured me as she held my hand, saying I was going to birth my baby and to not focus on anything else going on. I heard many things I didnt want to hear from the midwives, I experienced a cervical check I didn't consent to which was super painful, and I could feel the room around me was stressed. Mind you they appeared stressed from the get go of me even arriving there. I laid there and I prayed, for God to take action. literally after I prayed, the head Dr come in and I felt the room calm down. He spoke to me clearly and said he can see baby head, and that everything was okay, and that he would help baby a little bit with the vacuum. I remember thinking to myself, great, I'm going to have an episiotomy. the doctor explained to me what he was going to do, which was put the vacuum on, straighten babies head, and then take it off, then I could push baby out. So. up my legs went in stirrups. vacuum went on, Dr straightened babys head, and then took it off and told me to work with my body to push baby out. And that I did. everything happened so fast from there, midwife took baby, cut her cord, when I said no, and the midwife insisted baby needed air, James observed and announced we had a baby girl. I kinda felt stripped of that first special moment to hold my baby, as she was taken to get some "air" even though cut from her life source! But then, I got to hold my baby, and all that went away, I couldn't believe it. I had a daughter, Joy was here, I birthed her completed unmedicated which was a huge thing I wanted to accomplish. Although my birth didn't go to plan, I felt like super woman, I laboured mostly at home, and within getting to the hospital Joy was born within 45mins of being there. I was held and supported the most I've ever experienced in my life from Moran, and I'm so thankful she was there for me. I truely believe I would of ended up having a Caesarean when I didn't really need one if she wasn't there.
I have my theories of why my birth went like this and the internal work and reflection thats come of this birth experience has been a journey for myself and my partner. I also truely believe I wasn't breathing properly and more fighting the surges instead of working with them with my breath. I thought HypnoBirthing education was to woo woo and didn't do it. knowing what I know now, if I could go back, I think private birth education sessions would of been more beneficial, especially for my partner and us a couple.
So, its because of my experience, I have a burning desire to support women, and their partners in this important space. You really don't forget the birth of your baby and how you were made to feel, by everyone in your birth space.
Birth Doula support Brisbane and Gold Coast Hypnobirthing Brisbane and Gold Coast Birth Education Brisbane and Gold Coast